The End Is Near...

Matthew 7:13-14

"Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it."

Okay, so this was weird.  This is a Scripture that was highlighted in the sermon that we heard Sunday in Dallas.  Interesting....

So, it will have very little with what I will write in the following paragraphs, but I always find these coincidences something to note.  I think at times God uses them to show us different things with the same Scripture and such.  

We are almost done with our packing, and we have about a day an a half left before we make the 4 day trip to Montana to unpack our lives into a smaller apartment.  I feel I should be overjoyed to be moving forward with my life, but to be honest I'm in deep pain.  My thoughts have been held captive with the fact that I'm clueless how my brother is doing.  It seems things aren't well with him, but I feel I'm being forced to focus on things that I feel are so trivial.  I have wanted nothing more than to see him and let him know how much I love him.  How much I will miss the ability to spend a random weekend with him and the family.  I wish so much that I could carry their burden.  But I know this burden isn't mine to carry.  There's much that each of us must endure to fulfill our journey on this side of heaven and somethings are just not ours to bear.  

So I place my trust in God and His ability to see his work to completion.  I know that He is in the mist of my brother's situation because I'm overwhelmed by His peace.  Yet, my heart breaks because I'm leaving without having the opportunity to say goodbye to those I've loved all my life. God's timing is perfect and I will wait on Him...He will strengthen me to endure my pain-stricken heart to endure this journey.  I will persevere because He has a plan, and I eagerly wait to see this unfold.  It has to be great because God is good...always.

God, grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
the courage to change the things I can;
and the wisdom to know the difference.

This has been my meditation as of late.  I just don't know what to do.  I spend most nights praying for my brother...even in my sleep I pray for him.  I toss and turn, then I realize that I'm still praying for him.  It's not the first time I've done this, but it's been a long time.  It's exhausting, but I can't help it.  So, I've had to remember the truth in the serenity prayer that we have to trust God for those things that are completely out of our control.  And I'm in a situation where I feel that is true in every aspect of my life for the moment.  More craziness abounds...