Plans and Insecurities Sometimes Give Birth to Ramblings

Proverbs 16 (NIV)

1 To man belong the plans of the heart,
but from the LORD comes the reply of the tongue.

2 All a man's ways seem innocent to him,
but motives are weighed by the LORD.

3 Commit to the LORD whatever you do,
and your plans will succeed.

4 The LORD works out everything for his own ends—
even the wicked for a day of disaster.

5 The LORD detests all the proud of heart.
Be sure of this: They will not go unpunished.

6 Through love and faithfulness sin is atoned for;
through the fear of the LORD a man avoids evil.

7 When a man's ways are pleasing to the LORD,
he makes even his enemies live at peace with him.

8 Better a little with righteousness
than much gain with injustice.

9 In his heart a man plans his course,
but the LORD determines his steps.

10 The lips of a king speak as an oracle,
and his mouth should not betray justice.

11 Honest scales and balances are from the LORD;
all the weights in the bag are of his making.

12 Kings detest wrongdoing,
for a throne is established through righteousness.

13 Kings take pleasure in honest lips;
they value a man who speaks the truth.

14 A king's wrath is a messenger of death,
but a wise man will appease it.

15 When a king's face brightens, it means life;
his favor is like a rain cloud in spring.

16 How much better to get wisdom than gold,
to choose understanding rather than silver!

17 The highway of the upright avoids evil;
he who guards his way guards his life.

18 Pride goes before destruction,
a haughty spirit before a fall.

19 Better to be lowly in spirit and among the oppressed
than to share plunder with the proud.

20 Whoever gives heed to instruction prospers,
and blessed is he who trusts in the LORD.

21 The wise in heart are called discerning,
and pleasant words promote instruction. [a]

22 Understanding is a fountain of life to those who have it,
but folly brings punishment to fools.

23 A wise man's heart guides his mouth,
and his lips promote instruction. [b]

24 Pleasant words are a honeycomb,
sweet to the soul and healing to the bones.

25 There is a way that seems right to a man,
but in the end it leads to death.

26 The laborer's appetite works for him;
his hunger drives him on.

27 A scoundrel plots evil,
and his speech is like a scorching fire.

28 A perverse man stirs up dissension,
and a gossip separates close friends.

29 A violent man entices his neighbor
and leads him down a path that is not good.

30 He who winks with his eye is plotting perversity;
he who purses his lips is bent on evil.

31 Gray hair is a crown of splendor;
it is attained by a righteous life.

32 Better a patient man than a warrior,
a man who controls his temper than one who takes a city.

33 The lot is cast into the lap,
but its every decision is from the LORD.

Today I am reminded about how we plan for something and sometimes something completely comes of our plans. Sometimes things end up completely different than we plan. I participated in a watercolor workshop today because I love creating art, but I'm not great technically at it. I would love to be, but I've had very little professional training in the various mediums. So, I've embarked on an adventure to ease my fears, my insecurities in my artistic expressions. I have a clear plan before me, right?

Well, my experience at this workshop reminded me of my own frustration with my art. I plan one thing in my head, but by the end the art piece has taken on a life of it's own and becomes something I'd not planned. This isn't always bad, but it isn't alway good either. The main painting that we worked on through out the workshop was a typical subject that I paint--a landscape. But, there are certain techniques that I really struggle with thus the reason for taking the time to attend a workshop. Though I started with the intent to NOT do what I usually do, but old habits are hard to break. In the end, I still reverted back to what I knew well even thought I knew that it usually fails me when all was said and done. So, as far as creating a masterpiece I did not and it has eluded me once again, but I did learn a great deal. In fact, I learned much more than I'd planned.

All of this has led me down a path of asking a few questions. One, why do we plan in the first place when we know that it rarely works the way we planned? Two, when we get in a pinch why do we so easy throw the plan to the wind and revert back to what fails us? Three, why do we allow our fears and insecurities determine our path and/or our plan? I think that the first one I think is easy, at least for me, because I love knowing where to go next and have an idea of the result of a certain situation. This helps define what and why I am doing something, meaning what I'm doing has a purpose. We're all about finding purpose in our lives. The next question might be a little harder to answer because we don't always want to be as honest as is necessary with ourselves to answer it or maybe we don't see it in ourselves in the first place. As far as my art goes it's because I have always found acrylics easier to use and the techniques were much easier to wrap my head around, but these techniques aren't very useful when you are creating art work in watercolor. There are different brush strokes, methods of applying the paint to the surface being used, and how general concepts are interpreted in the process of artistic expression of light sources, shadows,varying hues...etc.

Now what does all of this discussion of watercolors have to do with Proverbs? Well, I was impressed with the failure of my plans to not do what I usually do, but I ended up doing. I have seen myself do this with so many things in my life whether it is my husband, my children, or things I should take to God, but convince myself that it's not necessary because it seems silly like my watercolor. Sometimes I do this with things that are important that I take to God, but because I may have experienced something similar and the last time I handled it well. The problem with the latter is that sometimes we are presented with similar situations so that we can learn something different or build on what we've already learned like in art. But when we fail to learn to lean on God to guide our paths what we lose usually is much more than just the need to start a painting over. Sometimes we say things we didn't plan. Sometimes we do things that we didn't plan that also end up hurting others or takes away things we love to do. But this Proverb in verse 3 reminds us that if we will "Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and your plans will succeed."

So as I continue to explore other mediums in art that I will keep in mind the appropriate techniques for that medium, and continue to seek God even in the mundane, everyday little things that are so easy to take for granted.