Monday, September 28, 2009

Breaks...Peace...Stillness...Contentment...Calling...

I haven't written in a long time because I felt I needed a break from just sharing my heart. Sometimes we need to say what's on our hearts but at other times we really need to just be still, know God is God, and the biggest of all, just listen. Though, at the same time I feel I've been so distracted lately even though I've not felt as conflicted, which was part of the reason I began writing again. I felt I had so much to say, but no platform, just no where to share my feeble thoughts. Writing has helped me cement and understand God's word in the mist of times of questioning and struggle. Hopefully, writing has proved a benefit for the trasnforming of my mind. Perhaps, all that has changed was my intellectual understanding of the Word, but I hope that not to be true.

Having said that, I want to talk about peace, stillness, contentment, and God's calling. Hopefully, this will be as clear as it is in my head with so many huge ideas, but I really do feel that they are related at times in our lives. So, let's get started with reading God's word!

Psalm 46

For the director of music. Of the Sons of Korah. According to Alamoth. A song. [a]

1 God is our refuge and strength,
an ever-present help in trouble.
2 Therefore we will not fear, though the earth give way
and the mountains fall into the heart of the sea,

3 though its waters roar and foam
and the mountains quake with their surging.
Selah

4 There is a river whose streams make glad the city of God,
the holy place where the Most High dwells.

5 God is within her, she will not fall;
God will help her at break of day.

6 Nations are in uproar, kingdoms fall;
he lifts his voice, the earth melts.

7 The LORD Almighty is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress.
Selah

8 Come and see the works of the LORD,
the desolations he has brought on the earth.

9 He makes wars cease to the ends of the earth;
he breaks the bow and shatters the spear,
he burns the shields [b] with fire.

10 "Be still, and know that I am God;
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth."

11 The LORD Almighty is with us;
the God of Jacob is our fortress.
Selah

My entire life I feel I have lived for the mountain top experiences with God, with friends, with adventures...you know what I'm talking about...living life for the weekend attitude...living life for the external fun and excitement that can be had in this life even though I know in the deepest parts of my heart of hearts, that only God can provide an everlasting peace and contentment that can not be shaken by the waves of life. No matter what comes our way, God is the foundation we need in our daily lives that is stable like a luxury cruise ship, but at the same time, it is so easy to fall back into the mind set that we are still stuck on the dingy being toss here and there with doubts(James 1:2-8) where God found us in the beginning of our journey, even though we are aware God has given us a major upgrade at this point in life. This upgrade is a trust in God that can't be easily displaced by the circumstances of life, our fears, or anything else in this temporal world. Trust that God equips those he calls to serve even when it doesn't seem to be working that way, or the truth of the situation. This is what I feel God has been showing me in my own life in a new and refreshing way.

I don't always remember that I don't have to give into what I perceive as a failing, which in turn raises up insecrurities of the past, that in turn sends me into a tail spin of wanting to just give up. God has not allowed me to do this. Fortunately and unfortunately, I am aware that he has huge plans for me in a way I that not only brings intense humility coupled with absoulte freaked out fear that makes me want to run and hide under my couch. Sadly I can't fit under my couch, but I know I need to give in, that being so much easier said than done.

A little over a year ago I was researching how God calls people to the plan he has for them, and I read Ex. 4 and came to vs. 13-14. After reading this my heart sank because I knew that the call I "heard" in 8th grad wasn't magically going to disappear, but God will forever pursue me so I might fulfill the purpose He has called me. There is no running from God. (As if all the times I've read the story of Jonah to my children the truth of it hadn't stuck to my brain like flour to honey!)

Still, we are like that aren't we? Always at some point seeking comfort in other places than in our Most Holy God so we can run away from what is uncomfortable? Aren't we always, always let down...disappointed in the end, but yet we always end up right back to complacency. And that complacency distracts us from what God is teaching us, growing in us, and drawing us slowly away from the call God has placed on our lives.

Complacency doesn't lend itself to contentment like we think it might. We get those two words mixed up a lot of the time. God some how helps us find contentment when we are in the center of His will, and yet we will so easily trade that for the mediocre state of complacency.

So let's go through today with a new attitude and new purpose not only to love and serve the Lord with all our body, mind, and strength, but always to enjoy the blessing of the luxury cruise ship instead of the dingy, as well as taking on a renewed attitude of obedience in God's call on our daily lives and in the bigger picture of our life long ministry.

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